Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Gucci Owner Picks Auto Executive for One of Global Luxury’s Top Jobs - WSJ

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

What is a good way to conduct an interview?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Scientists Knew Saber-Toothed Tigers Were Big — But This Skull Changes Everything - All That's Interesting

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Will German support for Ukraine decrease after the early elections on February 23, 2025?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I actually pay taxes

The #1 Underrated Vegetable with More Vitamin C Than an Orange, According to Dietitians - EatingWell

I don’t buy bullshit

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Scientists create a two-dimensional carbon material eight times stronger than graphene - Earth.com

I don’t cotton to rapists

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Jurors in Harvey Weinstein trial reportedly fighting among themselves - BBC

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Judge bars Trump administration from deporting family of Boulder attack suspect - The Washington Post

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Mayor Bass announces curfew for DTLA amid ongoing anti-ICE protests - ABC7 Los Angeles

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Is Beauty of Joseon Sunscreen good for oily skin?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

How do atheists explain the fact that when I pray to God, I feel better and I get a feeling of comfort? Doesn’t this prove that a God exists?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

2-year-old boy is swept away on luggage conveyor belt at Newark Airport in latest terror at beleaguered travel hub - New York Post

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Pirates Manager Ejected for Ripping Into Umps After Brutal Call Cost Team Tying Run - Sports Illustrated

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have a reading level above third grade

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I can count

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I can read

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I see through liars